Mr. Too Many Options

AKA Mr. Un-mateable.

I'd call him Mr. Undateable, but dating is about as far as you'll get with this man. This guy has so many options that dating is the only thing he has time for. Having lived in NYC for the past 3 years, I think I've met quite a few men who fall in this category. What really sparked this topic though was a recent conversation I had with a one of my best guy friends.

Over lunch we both started talking about our New York woes and he proceeds to talk about the women here:

Him: I'll miss the women here.
Me: (quizzical look on my face) Really? Why??
Him: The women here are so desperate.
Me: ... Seriously???

Nothing about this conversation, as transcribed here, surprised me. Well, not really. I'm actually quite used to the idea that the women here, as in many other major cities, are at the whim of male emotion. But to think of these women as "desperate" was a hard pill to swallow. It made me pause and think back on my own experiences, was I ever one of those "desperate" women? Who, even if only for the chance, will stick around and date a guy in hopes that she'll end up as the chosen one. Put that way, yes, I have been.

As my friend went on to explain it, he meets several women every week. Sometimes these women are nothing more than a drink after work, but in other cases they become dates and bed buddies. When you think about it, a couple women every week adds up to be quuuite a few women. And the unfortunate truth for these women, is that probably none of them will end up being the one he ends up with; I mean currently, he's just got too many options.

The more options a man has, the less likely he is to make a decision to be with one woman. That is until he gets tired of the game playing and having to deal with the emotional backlash associated with dealing with that many women at once (I honestly don't see how you guys do it, women are nuts). In my opinion, men who are in this situation often site their reason for not settling with just one woman as being, "What if I meet some one better?". This whole concept is foreign to me. If I meet a guy who I really like, enjoy being around and can see potential in, I'm ready to take steps to see where the situation can go and grow to become. The last thing I'm thinking is, well what if I meet a guy next week who is better than this guy? And that's probably because options for women ar a bit more limited than they are for men, especially in a city like New York.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying quality men are few and far between, but neither I nor my girlfriends meet a couple men a week who we actually wouldn't mind being seen out in public with. That may seem harsh but I'm keeping it real. But with all that said, maybe some of you guys out there who fall in this category can shed some light on this topic. Let's not be shy :o)