Thursday, September 30, 2010

Something Told Me...

Something told me that this might happen. Deciding to leave New York was difficult enough, but I definitely knew I was ready for the change. What I wasn't ready for was the repercussions that would come about from me making that leap.

Living in NYC can be like being on a drug. The city is loud, it's crowded and constantly pulsing with life. The buildings are tall, the lights are bright and there's always something going on. So in leaving NYC after living there for three years, I'm seriously going through withdrawals. I'm having to come down from my 3 year high and I can't say I like the effects. DC is a great city, the type of place that's perfect for having a career and raising a family but as a young adult, it can be a tad bit (dare I say it), boring.

My biggest frustration has come from realizing just how straight-laced DC can be. In just riding the train to and from work I can tell how entirely different this city is. Most of the other riders are wearing suits(only black or navy for the most part). I no longer see the "colorful" transit riders that grace the MTA. While working in my current job which is at a store in DC "fashion district", Georgetown, I've had customers(yes with an 's') tell me that they wouldn't buy certain flashier items because they didn't know where they would wear anything like that in DC. Huh? What is this blue-blooded conservative city I've come back to?

Over the past year, I believe I've experienced a lot of personal growth and development, but I can't say that I was fully prepared for this type of shift. I went from living in my own apartment with 3 roomies, holding down a career driven job, and being surrounded by friends who were having many of the same life experiences I was. Now I'm living back with my parents, working a job that is truly meant to be nothing more than temporary and struggling to get a leg up on what my next step to what successful entrepreneurship should be.

I know that adjusting to this drastically new life will be difficult and take time. But how much time it will take, I don't know. I just know that I have to keep my ultimate goal in sight. Damn this quarter life thing.

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

I'm Single Until...

Most of us know when being single begins, but when does it end? Is it when you decide to be monogomous with one person? Is it when you get engaged? Married?

I've always held the belief that being single doesn't end until the day I become a Mrs. But is that the "right" way to look at it?And by right, I guess I mean moral. Honestly, when filling out an application, any application you can name, and the single box comes up, don't you check "single" unless you're actually married?

This topic came up while speaking with one of my friends about whether it was okay to be in a relationship but hold conversations with people of the opposite sex who you may actually find yourself attracted to? Suprisingly enough, my thought is "no harm, no foul". That's like saying you can't have opposite sex friends while in a relationship. There's nothing wrong with simply talking to somebody of the opposite sex, the trouble starts when your mind starts to take it beyond that.

I really think that the bigger issue is that if you feel the need to talk to someone outside of your current relationship, especially someone that you already know peaks your interest maybe the one you're with, isn't actually the one for you. When you get into a relationship, I understand that you don't go blind. You will find other people attractive and that's natural. But when you begin exploring the what ifs, even if it's only in your mind, maaaybe you need to take a step back and reevaulate your current situation.

But then again, let me play devil's advocate in my own scenario. If you're single until engaged/married, shouln't you just be able to do what you want? Meet/talk/get close to whomever you want? See how tricky the whole idea of "single" can be?

Monday, September 20, 2010

Everybody's Married!

Last week I got the opportunity to do a little networking and socializing with one of my good friends from NYC. Her best friend just bought a house down here a couple months ago so she and her husband were having their housewarming.

Let me cut to the chase, I saw this gathering as a great potential place to find a prospect or two. I mean husbands usually have male friends right? And he did, plenty of them. Too bad they too, were all married. Well, let me not say ALL because there were probably 2 or 3 who were not. I don't mean to generalize but had this party been in NYC, married couples would be the outliers not the norm! Actually, there probably wouldn't have been any married couples at all, MAYBE an engaged pair but that's about it. And no, I'm not being dramatic. Just ask anyone who lives or has lived in NYC.

It honestly shocked me to see so many young, black married couples. I never believed the hype that black people just aren't getting married anymore but when you look at New York City, that's definitely the way it seems. Why is it that the dynamic between these two metropolitan areas is so entirely different?

Is this whatever little bit of Southern charm that's left in DC that doesn't look at settling down as the end of the world? Is DC just so boring that there's nothing else to do but get hitched? Lol. I'm sure that's not the reason, but there has to be something going on here.

Even though I don't know what has young people in DC feeling compelled to jump the broom, it was definitely refreshing to see.