Tuesday, September 21, 2010

I'm Single Until...

Most of us know when being single begins, but when does it end? Is it when you decide to be monogomous with one person? Is it when you get engaged? Married?

I've always held the belief that being single doesn't end until the day I become a Mrs. But is that the "right" way to look at it?And by right, I guess I mean moral. Honestly, when filling out an application, any application you can name, and the single box comes up, don't you check "single" unless you're actually married?

This topic came up while speaking with one of my friends about whether it was okay to be in a relationship but hold conversations with people of the opposite sex who you may actually find yourself attracted to? Suprisingly enough, my thought is "no harm, no foul". That's like saying you can't have opposite sex friends while in a relationship. There's nothing wrong with simply talking to somebody of the opposite sex, the trouble starts when your mind starts to take it beyond that.

I really think that the bigger issue is that if you feel the need to talk to someone outside of your current relationship, especially someone that you already know peaks your interest maybe the one you're with, isn't actually the one for you. When you get into a relationship, I understand that you don't go blind. You will find other people attractive and that's natural. But when you begin exploring the what ifs, even if it's only in your mind, maaaybe you need to take a step back and reevaulate your current situation.

But then again, let me play devil's advocate in my own scenario. If you're single until engaged/married, shouln't you just be able to do what you want? Meet/talk/get close to whomever you want? See how tricky the whole idea of "single" can be?

2 comments:

  1. I'm "single" until married/engaged. My mom always said "It don't mean a thing if you don't have a ring." On the other hand, if I am in a committed (exclusive) relationship, I'm not going to go around talking to guys I am attracted to, and/or guys who I know are attracted to me. With that said, it's nothing wrong with keeping said guys on my ehh "radar" ;)

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  2. It gets VERY tricky being single, especially if you're not sure what kind of level the relationship is in. I agree with Leigh Ann, I believe I'm single until I get married. And, if I'm in a committed relationship, I have no interest in looking around, especially if I'm fulfilled mentally/emotionally/physically/spiritually.

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