So I was going to write an indepth post about a tooootally different topic, but an experience I had tonight made me change focus.
I went out to happy hour with an ex co-worker of mine and I must say, surprisingly enough the male to female ratio was pretty decent. One of the guys attending struck up a conversation with me and we chatted on and off for most of the evening.
He was older than me, definitely a plus, especially after the conversation with my girlfriends the other night. In our conversation we covered everything from where we worked to where we were from, you know the basics. While talking about home, I mentioned my niece(a.k.a. the love of my life) and that's when he dropped the bomb. He has a child, a pre-teen daughter. Now, I'm not one to judge and my response wasn't a negative one, but I must have had some type of unsatisfactory look on my face because we didn't share too many more words after that.
After leaving the event I really starting thinking about something: if I end up deciding I want to date older men, it is very likely that some of them may have a child or even children. I mean I love my niece, but Lord knows I couldn't be a mother figure to anyone right now. Especially not a pre-teen, everybody knows that kids at that age can be difficult. And I'm not trying to have to restrain myself from laying hands on someone else's child lol.
Maybe I'm thinking too much, or maybe not. Is it shallow to discount someone based on a factor like having a child? Not that that's what I did but it's something to think about...
LOL "...laying hands on someone else's child"..Hilarious...I agree on the dating a man w/a child thing...It's a personal preference, like anything else. Dating someone w/a child (male or female) can be messy as hell..why put yourself through unnecessary drama! If you know you're not built to handle that kind of situation, why even put yourself through it?! You may not be able to control who you fall in love with, but you can control who you choose to date ;-)
ReplyDeleteAmen to that! After your last statement, I don't think I have anything else to say about that lol. I think trying to fool myself in to thinking I could be okay with dating a man with a child or children would just make things harder for me in the end.
ReplyDeleteNot I don't think all men with kids have drama, I just know how women(babymamas) can sometimes be, and I don't have the patience for that type of nonsense lol
Baby Mama Drama at 24 makes no sense. Wendy Williams says it in not so many words and she says it well: At this age, you're in your prime do not settle for headaches just to date.
ReplyDeleteI think its shallow to think that dating someone with a child automatically makes you a babysitter/ mother figure.. Singling someone out because of that, you miss out on a chance to get to know someone that is probably mature beyond his yrs.. Not to mention his life being in order.. And Im quite sure he wouldn't want just any old stranger around his child..
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